wedding planner and papers

Congratulations on your engagement and welcome to the exciting world of wedding planning! I’ve been a wedding photographer since 2005 so I’ve learned a lot about the process. The steps outlined below will guide you through the essential parts of planning the wedding, those things you must do before saying, “I DO”. Let’s get started.

1. Set the Wedding Date

Setting the date for your wedding is the most important part of your wedding plans because without a date you won’t be able to reserve any venues or vendors. Think about the most common question people ask when they find out about your engagement: “When is the wedding?” Your budget will also be affected by the time of year that you choose to get married. For example, if you’re on a low budget, consider planning your wedding in the Winter months because there are more wedding vendors to choose from since there aren’t as many weddings from December to February (except holidays) in cold-weather areas. 

essential wedding planning steps set a date

2. Make a Budget

Making a budget is all about facing reality. Some couples like to pick a ballpark figure and if they don’t go over that amount, then they’re happy with the outcome. Others are more meticulous about their spending habits and flock to the almighty spreadsheet to outline how every dollar will be spent. I truly believe that the budgeting process is a great exercise for couples to learn about each other’s spending habits and what’s important to them for the wedding. Maybe the groom really wants those designer socks for his groomsmen, or perhaps the bride doesn’t care about the latest fashion trend for her dress after all. In the end, you can learn a lot about your partner and you end up with a budget to which you can hold each other accountable.

3. Create a Guest List

Now that you’ve set the date and made a budget, it’s time to figure out who you want to come to your wedding. Start with your family members on each side to get an idea of your base. These are the people who will most likely RSVP to your wedding. Decide if you’re allowing single guests to bring a +1 and factor that into your total guest count. You’ll need the total guest count when you start looking at venues (see below). Don’t feel bad if you can’t invite everyone and their mother. I went to a Seinfeld show with my wife (then-fiance) a few months before we got married in 2003, and I’ll never forget that he opened his show with this line: “No one wants to come to your wedding.” and we both just looked at each other and burst out laughing because there’s some truth to the matter.

4. Choose a Wedding Party

The wedding party consists of the Maid (or Matron) of Honor, Best Man, Bridesmaid, Groomsmen, Junior Bridesmaid, Flower Girl(s), and Ring Bearer(s). I’ve been to weddings where there was no one in the wedding party, and weddings where the party was over 20 people! Generally speaking, these are the guests who are close to you, either relatives or best friends, who will be by your side as you speak your vows to one another. It’s not uncommon to purchase thank you gifts for each member of the wedding party, so be sure to factor that into your budget along with other expenses you might be expected to pay such as hair & makeup, attire, etc.

essential wedding planning steps choose wedding party

5. Visit and Book the Venue(s)

This is the part of your wedding planning where the rubber meets the road. You’ll be using your budget and guest list to determine the perfect location for your wedding. This is also the first time you’ll start to get a feel for what your wedding day will look like. Do you want an outdoor ceremony with an indoor reception (or vice versa)? Do you want an intimate ceremony at a private location or a spectacular event with hundreds of guests? Do some research for the types of venues that meet the vision for your special day. Once you have a short list, save yourself some time and give each place a call to make sure they’re available for your wedding date. Finally, plan a time to visit each location to see the facilities and get your questions answered on the spot. Some venues have special dates set aside when you can visit with sample wedding decor setup for you to review. But don’t show up unannounced because the venue wants to give you the best experience, and if they’re not ready for you then you could be turned off by their current state of operations such as construction, cleaning crews, decorating, etc.

Finally, do you have your total guest count? You’re going to need it before searching, visiting, and booking the venue(s) for your wedding. Depending on the size of the guest list, the options available to you will vary greatly in cost. Do you have 60 guests or 120 guests? The venue might have different room options available because it can only hold so many tables (plan for about 10 guests per round table). Will your ceremony be at a separate location from the reception? If so, can both places accommodate all of your guests?

essential wedding planning steps book the venue

6. Organize Catering for Reception

Once the venue is booked, the caterer is among the first vendors that couples reserve. While you’re visiting your favorite venues, you’ll want to know what are your options for catering. Some venues require that you utilize their staff and may provide a taste test of their menu options. If you’re allowed to hire your own catering company, then you’ll want to make this step the next priority since some venues also have rules about outside caterers. You want to be able to serve the food that you both like from a caterer that meets both your budget and expectations (and any rules imposed by the venue).

essential wedding planning steps organize catering

7. Shop for a Wedding Dress

For some brides, this step is more crucial than creating a budget (funny story: my wife had her dress picked out before we were even officially engaged). Finding that perfect dress could mean making multiple trips to the bridal shop with your girls in tow. You might even have to go out of town, to a shop several hours away, to try on the various designer gowns. It helps to have a general idea of what you want the dress to look like (or maybe even more important what it DOESN’T look like) so that your bridal stylist can help you narrow down the selection. They know their inventory and you should rely on their expertise to help you choose your gown. They’ve seen hundreds, if not thousands, of brides in all kinds of their dresses, so if you don’t know why something isn’t working, chances are they’ll be able to address the concerns you didn’t even know you had.

Shop Owner Ashley McAchran from Studio I Do says, “My advice to all brides is that it doesn’t matter if you try on 1 gowns or 100, you’ll know when you find the one and YOU will feel it before you or anyone else sees it!”

essential wedding planning shop for wedding dress

8. Hire a Photographer

Unless you have a wedding planner, some might say that the photographer is like the director on the wedding day (until the reception, where the DJ usually takes over), helping you stay on track by capturing the key moments as they unfold. The key to hiring a photographer is to look at their style of images and meet in person to gauge their overall personality. Do they have a wide range of wedding work to review on their website and/or social media? Are they personable and attentive to your needs? You’re going to spend the entire wedding day with this person, and a good part of your wedding plans will revolve around what you want the photographer to capture, so if you can’t get along or don’t like their personality, then it’s going to be a long day.

Hiring a wedding photographer is a daunting task because the market is saturated with everyone from amateurs to professionals. There’s nothing wrong with hiring an amateur who’s just starting out in order to save some money, except that you risk losing important moments being captured on the wedding day. I know this because when I first started out, I made mistakes that were pointed out to me by the couple after the wedding, ones that haunt me to this day. No one is perfect, so even professionals make mistakes – but less often.

I’d be delighted if you choose to work with me on your wedding so please contact me soon to check my availability for your wedding date.

$1499 SPECIAL OFFER – LIMITED TIME ONLY!

For a limited time, Kinstler Photography is offering a Wedding Photography Package which includes everything below for only $1499! This offer expires on July 31, 2021 so please contact me soon to check availability for your wedding date.

  • 6 Hours of Wedding Day Coverage
  • Full-Sized digital images on USB with printing rights
  • 1-Hour Engagement Session (or trade for after wedding session)
  • 20 Gift Prints up to size 8×10 (mix & match)
  • 16 x 20 Fine Art Wall Portrait (standout mount)
  • Online Gallery & Ordering for 3 months
  • 20% Off Photo Books & Albums
  • BONUS: Surprise gift after wedding!

Popular Upgrades (only available with Special Offer)

  • Additional Hour of Coverage – $150 / hour
  • Second Photographer – $400
  • Wedding Photo Book – $625

essential wedding planning steps hire photographer

9. Hire a DJ

The DJ sets the tone for your reception and thus your guests’ overall impression of your wedding day. No one wants an inexperienced DJ running the show because there’s a certain cadence that happens at weddings to which most vendors are accustomed. You’ll want someone who has at least 100 weddings under their belt to help things go smoothly. A good DJ will take command of the reception when your guests are ready to party. Be sure to setup a meeting with your short list of DJs to learn their personality and how they can help you realize the wedding of your dreams, too.

Professional DJ Taylor Haycox says, “We all have a few songs that are extra special to us or have a little more meaning. When you meet with your DJ, have your “must haves” ready to share with them. (And even if there are specific songs you don’t want played – those too!) It’s our job to keep the party going and we want to do that with the songs that mean the most to you, as a couple, and to your guests.”

essential wedding planning steps hire the dj

10. Shop for the Cake

This is perhaps the best part of planning a wedding, unless you’re trying to maintain your figure. Otherwise, you get to sample a lot of different wedding cakes. Look for bakers who have good reviews if you’re unsure where to start, then narrow them down by proximity to your venue. You want your cake to be fresh and more importantly, available to be delivered at the expected time. A bakery that’s too far away may encounter delivery delays due to traffic or unexpected personal appointments on your wedding day.

essential wedding planning steps order the cake

11. Hire a Florist

When you meet with the florist, they’re going to want to know your style or theme of the wedding and the colors you’ve selected for your wedding party. Based on this knowledge, a good florist will work with you to design the floral scheme that best matches your ideas for the wedding. Use their extensive knowledge to learn what’s in season for your date and ask if they have any unique arrangements they’ve created in the past. I’m no expert when it comes to florists, but the really good ones have always amazed me by the decor and atmosphere they create.

essential wedding planning steps find florist

12. Book the Officiant

Oftentimes the officiant is overlooked during the initial wedding plans, but you can’t get married unless you have someone licensed / ordained to perform and witness this legal ceremony. Basically, you can’t get married without them so be sure to not forget this important step.

essential wedding planning steps hire officiant

Bonus Tip – Too Much to Handle? Hire a Wedding Planner

If this all seems too daunting or you just don’t have the time, it’s a good idea to hire a professional wedding planner to assist you with all the decisions and meetings that you need to make. A wedding planner will not only setup a detailed timeline of your wedding day, but also they will guide you in making the best decisions to design the wedding of your dreams. Most important, they will help you stay within your budget, and perhaps even save you money!

Thank you for taking the time to read this article. Post your wedding planning stories in the comments below and share this post with your engaged friends!